Today you find me delighting in my developing cold – to which I am eternally grateful because it means I don’t feel like painting my room and have used the time instead to write and shed some more emotional baggage – or at the very least highlight it. Either way that was my reason for crying today.
It has really been 8 months since I last wrote in this Blog. My car has travelled over 2000 miles and I now have over 8600 tracks in my music library. The other development is in regard to the statement I made in the “Who” section, where I describe “significant other” as “not yet”. This has now changed to “yes”. 14th June 2007 the day we first met and the roller coaster hasn’t hit the breaks until now. Suffice to say, the details will not be appearing here but if it is to be, my emotional outpouring might.
Of course, the part of this journey I still forget; until now, my parents were unaware that I was gay, so using this opportunity which I had foreseen, I admitted (an honest but cowardly word) this to be true.
I tell it in this way because I struggle with the concept of not being truthful yet always feared their reaction after hearing the news. I knew that when the question was asked, I would, without hesitation be honest. With everything this life has thrown at me, one thing has never been more certain and my knowledge of this has spanned more than a decade. Of course denying the truth to myself would have been unbearable, which is why in 2000 I stopped pretending otherwise.
I needn’t go further with this because of its unremarkable nature compared to other stories you might have read, nevertheless, over the initial awkwardness and feeling of nakedness, things have returned to normality for my parents, if not for me.

This of course is the reason for my following ramblings. How misguided people are, to not realise why we are compelled to form relationships, for they are one of the greatest tools we have to help understand ourselves.

Do I know you? At the traffic lights, your attention is drawn to enthusiastic waving. Looking, pausing, looking again – they do the same. They’re sure they know who they’re waving to. Panic sets in as you scramble to remember who you know of that age and sex. Embarrassment “help; who is this person?” Shame “I’ve forgotten who you are” as the lights change and you depart in the opposite direction. Intrigue “how did they know me?”. Relief – having spent the next 24 hours checking contacts and records, you’re sure you’re correct and they must know only of your body double.

I’ve yet to discover the delicate fragrance of “crushed silk” so where am I suppose to find “neon amber”!

“Spontaneous – sexy – connected”
“CK IN2U him is a fresh woody oriental that penetrates with lime gin fizz and rushes into a combination of cool musks that radiate from top to bottom and leaves you wanting more.”

“Ck IN2U her is a fresh floriental, combining notes of pink grapefruit, sugar orchid and neon amber to create the ultimate sensory experience of fresh, warm and sexy”